prairie wrote:
Where I'm living now my roommate was kind enough to give me the weekend alone again, and I spent yesterday without interaction with anyone, didn't go into public, no TV exposure or news or anything, and it was so different than a normal day. My ideas and perceptions could build on each other for hours, I could stop at any moment and just cast my mind's net over everything I was perceiving and I could relax to find anything I was interested in. Nothing was being shoved at me, forced into my awareness. Reading your post above was supportive of that. I especially liked this (and am especially hating how properly I'm writing these thoughts in sentences):
You know I struggle with sentences, etc? Your weekend experience sounds wonderful.
prairie wrote:
Why didn't I think to ask this simple question instead of focusing on what's happening to me? So not why the TV makes me want to punch the wall, but that when it does that it's when I've woken up and am have good connection with myself and wanting to spend the day doing meaningful things directed by what I find when I cast my mind's net around the subtle things going on around me that day.
prairie, this may or may not be the appropriate thread to pursue this (if you want to pursue it publicly, that is). I'm responding without implying your experience is 'just like mine' and if my attempts at triangulation aren't helpful, just let me know.
I love intelligently simple questions, because they give the most freedom to explore. since I don't have any such questions, here are my experiences:
Sometimes when I'm knocked off kilter, I first focus on what's happening to me. that might be a way to balance my OCDness with my ADHDness. and I don't do that all the time. I can't even say it's a conscious decision -- the pattern seems to be, when something familiar is activated, I can hurl face-first into the barrier within; when something unfamiliar is activated, I seem to examine the activation process so I can recognize it the next time.
The energy emitted by a lot of tv programs sort of seems to be trying to scramble my signal, or reanimate stuff I've worked to disable. I'm not surprised at the english terminology, "shows" and "programs."
prairie wrote:
GoingOn wrote:
- I feel like a gyroscope, creative enough to recognize, receive and (when required) respond to most things when I feel this internal centre. It took me many years to grasp that.
I love that word, and the connotations. If you try to twist one around, it fights back and twists around to keep its internal orientation to the universe.
Quite
